Meditation. The answer to health problems, emotional problems and a score of related issues. One simple word that conjures up images of serenity, soothing music, people with benign and blissful faces, straight backs, legs arranged in the perfect lotus pose, oblivious to the world, including pesky mosquitoes, flies, noise and the hard floor.
Wonderful as all of this is for them, if you are struggling with simply sitting still and calm for a few minutes and that seems as unlikely as having dinner on Jupiter, then the first thing you need to know is that IT'S FINE. You are not alone. Most people have felt the same way in the start and I for one, struggled for years before I could even have a minor engagement with #meditation. In fact, my first few flirtations with meditation were like a series of blind dates gone horridly wrong. I was so eager, so enthusiastic, so keen, so willing...so everything. But I was totally wrong in my approach and my guides were too rigid in theirs.
One evening, I organized a session at home. I invited a meditation guide and few friends over. Although the latter had no interest in meditation, they came along to humor me. The guide began his lesson which was just a couple of words long. We had to relax, breathe and focus on our breath. A few minutes later, my friends (the disinterested ones!) were all looking like the epitome of the stereotypical "meditators." Focused, lost in their world, calm and the rest of it. As for me, I was looking at them and crying. Tears were rolling down with the sheer frustration of wanting something, an experience so desperately and not having it. While the so called "side liners", seemed to be were enjoying what thy did not even want!
I finally quit. Meditation was clearly not for me. And I did not want to give it any more shots. I silently sulked for a few years over my absolute lack of ability on this front. And then, in the midst of a particularly challenging phase in my life, I discovered that meditation had quietly "come to me." It was not anything dramatic -- no visions of light or God or voices. Just a stillness that gently swept over me as I sat in the the clamor of a bustling metropolis, watching the waves from my window and listening to the birds, as they made their way home. My awareness was just on those two sounds and for a few moments, nothing else existed. Or mattered.
This was my first conscious meditative experience. One that lead to many more wonderful paths and discoveries, all converging to my becoming a Meditation Facilitator and Guide. It became such a fulfilling practice, that with time I started holding Meditation Retreats in India.
Over the years, I found that most people encounter a few common challenges and hurdles on their path to embracing the practice of meditation. Here, in the post, I am addressing the most common ones. If you have one that's not included here, feel free to write to me or leave a comment, and I shall be happy to address it.
Over the years, I found that most people encounter a few common challenges and hurdles on their path to embracing the practice of meditation. Here, in the post, I am addressing the most common ones. If you have one that's not included here, feel free to write to me or leave a comment, and I shall be happy to address it.
Challenge 1: I can’t control my thoughts
Do you have incessant mental chatter? Thoughts flooding your head? You are not alone! Thoughts are a natural activity of your mind. You simply notice them more when you sit quietly to meditate.
Do you have incessant mental chatter? Thoughts flooding your head? You are not alone! Thoughts are a natural activity of your mind. You simply notice them more when you sit quietly to meditate.
Solution
Trying to stop thoughts is like trying to stop the wind. It’s impossible. So stop resisting and trying to make your thoughts go away. Notice them as they come and treat them like passing clouds. But don’t let your mind float away with them. Or imagine the thoughts coming in from one ear and exiting from another. If a particular thought keeps coming back, make a mental note of it and pay attention to it later.
Trying to stop thoughts is like trying to stop the wind. It’s impossible. So stop resisting and trying to make your thoughts go away. Notice them as they come and treat them like passing clouds. But don’t let your mind float away with them. Or imagine the thoughts coming in from one ear and exiting from another. If a particular thought keeps coming back, make a mental note of it and pay attention to it later.
Challenge 2: I have too many distractions
Too many distractions or noises in your ambience? Welcome to the 21st century! Escaping distractions can be tough, but embracing them need not be.
Solution
First of all, remember meditation helps you quiten you mind. Not the environment you live in. You do not need a soundproof room to meditate. Though it helps to find a relatively quiet and peaceful meditation corner. If that is not possible, invest in a good pair of earplugs. And deal with the remainder sounds and distractions around you. Let them fade into the background. One participant in my workshop told me that somehow his wife would always land up using the pressure cooker when he sat to meditate. He could not change his timing, nor could he convince her to change hers. So he decided to integrate and follow the sound of the pressure cooker in his meditation. It worked quite well for him!
First of all, remember meditation helps you quiten you mind. Not the environment you live in. You do not need a soundproof room to meditate. Though it helps to find a relatively quiet and peaceful meditation corner. If that is not possible, invest in a good pair of earplugs. And deal with the remainder sounds and distractions around you. Let them fade into the background. One participant in my workshop told me that somehow his wife would always land up using the pressure cooker when he sat to meditate. He could not change his timing, nor could he convince her to change hers. So he decided to integrate and follow the sound of the pressure cooker in his meditation. It worked quite well for him!
Challenge 3: This does not work for me
Tried a meditation technique that did not work for you? Or joined a group where everyone was in a deep meditative state while you wondered what you are doing wrong?
Solution
This is one of the biggest stumbling blocks for new meditators and one that I feel is not sufficiently addressed by teachers, facilitators and guides. I find that there is no one common technique that is perfect for everyone. But there is a technique that is perfect for you! There are hundreds of ways to get into a meditative state. If one is not working for you, try another. If you have too much restless energy, try a technique with movement, like dance or dynamic meditation. But make sure you sincerely stick to one technique for at least two weeks before changing to another one.
This is one of the biggest stumbling blocks for new meditators and one that I feel is not sufficiently addressed by teachers, facilitators and guides. I find that there is no one common technique that is perfect for everyone. But there is a technique that is perfect for you! There are hundreds of ways to get into a meditative state. If one is not working for you, try another. If you have too much restless energy, try a technique with movement, like dance or dynamic meditation. But make sure you sincerely stick to one technique for at least two weeks before changing to another one.
Challenge 4: Results-Driven Fallacies
You live in a competitive, result-oriented environment. You are used to deadlines, tangible outputs. You get frustrated when they don't see results. After all, if you can't see results, why continue doing something, right? Wrong!!
Solution
Meditation is not a quick fix and there is no fast-over-the-counter version of it. Establishing a regular meditation practice can take some time. Just because you don't see results right away,doesn't mean nothing is happening. Have faith in the outcome ... and it will come. I find that Guided Meditation works wonderfully well for people who are just beginning and having trouble with their practice. Get a good Guide or Facilitator. Have a chat about your temperament and the hurdles you are facing. Devise a program that works for you. Start with 3-6 Guided sessions a week and then taper them down as your personal practice becomes smoother.
Meditation is not a quick fix and there is no fast-over-the-counter version of it. Establishing a regular meditation practice can take some time. Just because you don't see results right away,doesn't mean nothing is happening. Have faith in the outcome ... and it will come. I find that Guided Meditation works wonderfully well for people who are just beginning and having trouble with their practice. Get a good Guide or Facilitator. Have a chat about your temperament and the hurdles you are facing. Devise a program that works for you. Start with 3-6 Guided sessions a week and then taper them down as your personal practice becomes smoother.
Challenge 5: Social Meditator
Do you find that you can only meditate during your yoga class or with a meditation group? Anytime you break the routine or miss a class you also skip meditating?
Do you find that you can only meditate during your yoga class or with a meditation group? Anytime you break the routine or miss a class you also skip meditating?
Solution
Here’s the great thing about meditation. One you have begun the practice, you don't need to rely on anyone or anything other than yourself. It’s fine to combine meditation with yoga (#YogaMeditation), but the two are not interdependent. While you can continue meditating in a group, there is no reason to stop meditating if you miss a session, or two, or even leave the class altogether. After all, you can meditate wherever you find a quiet place to sit. You don’t need to get to anywhere, wear special clothing, or stick to a timetable. Just sit!
Here’s the great thing about meditation. One you have begun the practice, you don't need to rely on anyone or anything other than yourself. It’s fine to combine meditation with yoga (#YogaMeditation), but the two are not interdependent. While you can continue meditating in a group, there is no reason to stop meditating if you miss a session, or two, or even leave the class altogether. After all, you can meditate wherever you find a quiet place to sit. You don’t need to get to anywhere, wear special clothing, or stick to a timetable. Just sit!
Challenge 6: Sitting in an uncomfortable posture
Do you find it really uncomfortable to sit still for too long? Does sitting cross- legged on the floor create physical discomfort that is so distracting that you cannot meditate?
Solution
Trying to sit crossed legged on a hard surface can be challenging. If you are physically uncomfortable this will dominate your awareness and it will be impossible to relax. Sitting with back support and with the feet flat on the floor works best for most people. If you are still uncomfortable, try a moving meditation, which can be just as beneficial.
Trying to sit crossed legged on a hard surface can be challenging. If you are physically uncomfortable this will dominate your awareness and it will be impossible to relax. Sitting with back support and with the feet flat on the floor works best for most people. If you are still uncomfortable, try a moving meditation, which can be just as beneficial.
Challenge 7: Does meditation music (#MeditationMusic) really help? I often feel more distracted when listening to it.
Solution
Music is in no way necessary for meditation. However, some people find that the right meditation music helps them go into a deeper state of relaxation. This can have a flip side though. In my experience, if the music has certain sounds that don't match my personal vibrational frequency, or in plain words, if I don't like a certain voices or sounds, it can become more of an impediment or distraction. Certain chants or music could make the listener feel a bit spooked, or irritable even. I recommend listening to and filtering your meditation music before you begin your meditation session. Pick something soft, unobtrusive and devoid of too many highs and lows.
Music is in no way necessary for meditation. However, some people find that the right meditation music helps them go into a deeper state of relaxation. This can have a flip side though. In my experience, if the music has certain sounds that don't match my personal vibrational frequency, or in plain words, if I don't like a certain voices or sounds, it can become more of an impediment or distraction. Certain chants or music could make the listener feel a bit spooked, or irritable even. I recommend listening to and filtering your meditation music before you begin your meditation session. Pick something soft, unobtrusive and devoid of too many highs and lows.
With so many solutions at hand, do give meditation another chance. But remember to be gentle on yourself and make an honest, sustained effort. After all, everything that’s really worth it takes some time and effort.
Love,
Bindiya Murgai
www.healinghideaway.in
Read more on #Meditation, at #HealingHideaway
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